Friday, May 3, 2013

7 Quick Takes Friday

I've had a lot of post ideas swirling around in my head, but haven't found the time to write them down. So these quick takes are seven things I've been wanting to write about but haven't yet. Oh well! Such is finitude =)

1. Last Sunday was the "Prayers for Hope and Healing" event, and it went great. I'd say there were about 30 people at the talk and a few more at the mass, which seemed good for a first-time event. My prayer was that everyone who needed to be there was there, and that it would be a comfort even to people who couldn't come or didn't feel ready. A big highlight was that after mass, the celebrant priest exposed the Blessed Sacrament and then offered a healing prayer to anyone who wanted one. Pretty cool. I won't lie and say my eyes weren't a bit...misty...laying all of my desires and hurts at the feet of our Eucharistic Lord, and receiving a prayer and blessing from a priest.

Jesus, I trust in you.

2. The talk before the mass was excellent! I highly, highly recommend Kevin Well's book "Burst"! His talk focused on the Christian understanding of suffering, how it can be redemptive, and how to carry the cross of infertility well. Again, misty was so wonderful to hear someone put so many of my thoughts into words, and offer guidance and hope from their own journey.

It's about infertility, adoption, failed adoptions, brain trauma, murder, love, and baseball....!

3. The other awesome thing about Sunday was meeting and talking with other people who live near me and who are struggling with infertility. I am so, so, SO grateful for everyone I've met through this blog, but I'm sure you'll understand how great it is to talk with someone in person! I'm brainstorming now other events to propose to the Archdiocese, largely as a way to build something of a community around this issue, or at least a place where people can go for comfort and understanding friendship.

4. As I said earlier, my doctor has given us 2 options for "next steps": a sonohysterogram and/or Tamoxifen. After some discussion, Mr. M and I have decided to do neither for the time being. Mr. M said he just needs a break from doctor's visits and wants to explore revisiting the SA. And scheduling would be a challenge the next few months anyway. May was a bust for the sonohysterogram since Dr. C was on vacation. I'm traveling at the end of May and then we're going on vacation (!!!) in June, then I travel again in July. So I think we're just going to wait and see for the time being and revisit further diagnostic tests/treatments later in the summer.

                                                   (where we're going for vacation)

5. Here's a revelation and a resolution: the resolution is not to look at "mommy blogs" anymore (excepting the ones on the side of my own blog). The revelation: I feel left out and jealous when I read blogs filled with cute kids! That's a fact. But I hesitated to give up the mom blogs because they're still my sisters in Christ, after all! And to be perfectly honest, I felt a little resentful at feeling left out...I wondered why more mom blogs can't be more conscious of the fact that not everyone's life revolves around babies and play-dates...until my ever-wise husband pointed out that they talk all about such things because they're talking to other moms. My own mom-friends IRL don't bombard me with mom-and-baby stuff because they know me and love me...but if I was a fly on the wall at one of their play-dates, I'm sure it would be different! So all that is to say, for my peace of mind and a better focus on my own vocation as God has given it to me (and to avoid the near occasion of sin...jealousy) I'm going to steer clear of mommy blogs for now. Maybe for a long time - maybe until I have one of my own? ha ha

6. IF I am ever blessed to hold in my hand a little stick that tells me that there's a brand new human being growing within me...I think that I'll feel a lot like Elinor Dashwood when she finds out that Mr. Ferrars is not, in fact, married:

(I hope I didn't spoil the ending for anyone!) I feel like I have a lot in common with Elinor these days: a great longing for something that seems impossible, having to watch other people receive the blessing I want (not that I'm not happy for them!), getting older without feeling like my life is moving forward, etc. She's a good role model, too, I think, for how to bear sorrows of the heart virtuously!

7. This, on the other hand, is my new theme song for CD1. It was the song we played to accompany our wedding rehearsal "slideshow" (the kind where you put together all the pictures of you from babyhood through courtship). I love it, and I think it's perfect for CD1.

A beautiful description of marriage, too!

Have a wonderful weekend =)



  1. We got to see Matt Maher in concert, he wrote a really beautiful love song we love. Music can be so helpful in pain and in joy...

    About the mommy blogs... there is no sin in avoiding them. There is wisdom in not tempting yourself. Why go shopping at your favorite store if you have no money? Why look at homes on sale out of the your price range? Dwelling on what you can't have makes it all the worse. Hang in there, I really feel your pain. It is hard line to walk; to love our friends who are parents when our hearts long to be parents. Avoiding extra unnecessary reminders will help.

  2. Sometimes a break from all the appointments and meds is just what we need. The SA is one of the most awkward things we've ever done - but it was worth it as I've never been more relieved than when we got The Man's results. One thing that has always helped me on this road is answers - even when they weren't good, at least there was something!

    Praying for you and hoping you are celebrating a BFP very soon!!

  3. Thats funny, I just watched that movie yesterday... :)

    Glad your even went so well!

  4. Oh, and where are you going for vacation, if you don't mind sharing? Looks like our kind of trip--we went to Breckenridge, Colorado for our (summer) honeymoon.

    1. It is Colorado! Estes park, to be exact. We're going there and Denver. I lived in Denver for a year but mr. M has never been. We can't wait!

  5. I'm glad you had the Healing Mass & also gave your desires up to Jesus. It is freeing. And if I'm being honest, a hard thing to do. Trust completely. Human nature doesn't default that way.
    I completely understand not reading the mommy blogs for the time being. I couldn't do it either before we adopted our son. It just hurt too much. And yes, I was jealous. I feel bad, as a blogger with children, that sometimes I don't have more "non-childlike-things" to write about. Well, I do, but sometimes they don't make it from my head onto the blog ... I forget like none-other. I used to write about all my IF tests & procedures, etc, but since I'm not doing that anymore .... I struggle to write sometimes. I hope I'm not coming across as mean or nasty, just trying to say that I understand where you are coming from on blogging, taking a break from TTC, etc.
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts & allowing me to share mine with you! :)

    1. No, I totally understand. We write what we live! I think at the root of it is that fact I want to live the mama life and can't. Looking at mom blogs can't change that and generally makes me feel worse, not better. I like how AM said it above - why dwell on what I don't have? I'm glad you shared your thoughts :)

  6. Have fun on your vacation! I knew that picture looked familiar...DH and I visited Estes Park last summer. What gorgeous scenery!

    I need to watch Sense and Sensibility again. It's been too long. :)